Penis Size Matters For Men, But Mainly In The Locker Room

MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA - Men who reported a larger-than-average penis size had higher self-esteem, better general health and higher overall body satisfaction than those with an average or below-average penis size, says Annabel Chan, 29, a researcher with Victoria University.
When it comes to the penis, size does matter to men - but this has more to do with the locker room than the bedroom.
"Men are more concerned about how their overall body size compares to the perceived male ideal than they are about how their size might impact on their sexual relations," said Chan, the study's principal researcher.
She said the average flaccid penis size found in her study was 8.5cm (3.4 inches) and the average aroused penis size was 16cm (6.3 inches).
Chan is delving deep into the male psyche as part of the university's study into penis size, body image and mental health.
And the investigation, one of the first of its kind, has revealed "locker room syndrome" is rife.
Chan studied at Singapore's Tanjong Katong Girls' School and Tampines Junior College before moving to the United Kingdom to study psychology and graphic design. Now she's breaking new ground as she completes her PhD in clinical psychology at VU in Melbourne.
More than 700 men aged 18-76 from 43 countries were surveyed for the study, which found that men who reported a larger-than-average penis size had higher self esteem, better general health and higher overall body satisfaction than those with an average or below-average penis size.
Most respondents, 67.3 percent, said they believed they would feel better about themselves if they had a bigger penis.
The study also revealed that men who were happy with the size of their penis were less likely to engage in online dating or to use the erectile dysfunction drug, Viagra.
Chan said, because a large penis was considered a cultural ideal, the survey results were not a great surprise, but they provided fresh insight into male perceptions about their bodies.
Less than 6 percent of respondents were satisfied with their body size, with 89.7 percent wanting to be bigger.
Overweight men were found to have lower self esteem and higher body dissatisfaction, and to use the internet more for socialising.
"We have relatively little data about the body image of men because most of the research in this area concentrates on women," Chan said.
"It means men don't really get much help in terms of therapy, and options out there to get help."
from Bernama

Fire Department Cuts Weight Fastener Off Penis

COSTA MESA, CALIFORNIA - In what firefighters described as a once-in-a-lifetime call, officials with the Costa Mesa Fire Department’s Urban Search and Rescue squad were summoned early Tuesday morning to Hoag Memorial Hospital Presbyterian in Newport Beach to save another man’s penis from perishing.
The man, whom authorities declined to identify, other than saying that he was in his 50s, had apparently put his penis through the hole of a steel, ring-shaped dumbbell weight fastener, two or three days earlier.
The device got stuck, and he couldn’t remove it. The penis had blackened and swollen to five times its normal size, authorities said. In order to remove the ring, firefighters had to use a saw to cut through it.
“They said his comment was, ‘This will make me the chief of my tribe,’” said Costa Mesa Battalion Chief Scott Broussard, who like others in the department, heard about the incident the next morning.
The man thought the weight from the steel object would make his organ longer, but what he did to it almost rendered it useless, authorities said.
The steel collar-like fastener cut off circulation to the man’s penis, said Capt. Dave Kearley. As a result, blood could not flow out of it, and it swelled to the point that the man couldn’t remove the ring, Kearley said.
Broussard added that doctors at Hoag had told the man, who refused immediate treatment, that if he waited any longer to remove the fastener, the flesh in his penis would die.
“He was kind of a wingnut,” Broussard said.
Staff kept him in the hospital under a psychiatric hold and called the Fire Department to come remove the item because they didn’t have the tools to do it, Broussard said. Medical personnel tied down the man to a table and sedated him for the emergency, he said.
Firefighters had to don full surgery garb, including masks and scrubs.
The men constructed a watering system to keep the sparks from the sawing — which were flying half-way across the room — from injuring the patient as they cut through the inch-thick ring around his penis.
The delicate procedure took two hours.
“They also slid a little piece of metal between the collar and his thing, so if it slipped past it wouldn’t hit his thing,” Broussard said.
If anything, the incident demonstrated the versatility of the city firefighters’ rescue skills, Broussard said.
“If we’re cutting people out of some kind of building, or if we’re cutting right up next to somebody’s flesh and don’t damage his flesh, then it’s a good day,” he said.
from The Daily Pilot

What It's Like Being Openly Gay At Langston University

LANGSTON, OKLAHOMA - Langston University was a choice out of three different universities. My choices were between Lincoln University in M, Tougaloo College in Miss., or Texas College in Texas. I chose Langston. I thought Langston University would give me an experience that I would never forget and it did. I had a few friends that went to Langston also, which is another reason why I chose Langston. My friends that attended Langston told me that I would have a blast, and that I would meet so many different people from different places, and I would fit in easily. Little did I know I was in for it.
The first day of school at Langston was rough because I was gay. In my elementary algebra class the class was packed and I saw one seat available. So I sat down. The guy next to me immediately got up and moved his seat from me and he told the teacher he wasn't sitting by a faggot. Then a girl traded him seats.
Another time I was going in the restroom in Moore Hall, and as I walked in a guy said this isn't the girl's restroom. Then he and his friends began to laugh. As I walked to the business office a woman and her son walked by and the words "gay boy" trembled out of her son's mouth. Then as I walked in the cafeteria to eat, people stared, mugged and whispered things about me.
Another time I was at a football game and I walked up the blenchers to find a few friends. This man told his son to close his eyes when I walked by and said, "Don't look at that faggot." Then when I finally got up to the top of the bleachers, my friends were sitting with their boyfriends and as I sat down their boyfriends left and told them they would see them later.
At a conference, a teacher asked me why I called this girl a bitch. I told her because she called me a faggot. The teacher said, "You are a faggot. A bitch is a female dog. Is that girl you called a bitch walking on four legs?" After that comment I left the classroom. Being at Langston has been one of the most miserable times of my life. Students are rude and mean. I ask myself what did I do to make people hate me so much. I feel like less than a person. As I walk the campus of Langston University, there's always rude comments and laughter being done behind my back.
Why is it that I'm being discriminated against by my own race? We're all African- Americans and our ancestors went through the same things. Our skin is the same. If someone shot a bullet at me I will feel it just like everyone else. I'm no different-just my sexual preference. We are all equal. So why is it that a lot of people discriminate against me because of my sexual orientation? I don't discriminate against anybody and I don't judge anybody, so why do I have to feel less than somebody? Sometimes I cry myself to sleep every night in my room, wanting so badly to go home. I just want to get my plane ticket back to California and leave Langston behind. The only reason I'm still here is because God and my mother. They gave me the strength, courage and faith to stay alive, and to not feel so depressed because of who I am. If people don't like me that's their problem, not mine. I must be doing something right if my name is in other people's mouths. I'm not at Langston University to make friends or to argue with students. I'm here for my education, just like the rest of the students. I deserve the same respect as everyone else. I know I'm a good person and there is a place for me in society. I am a proud gay African-American.
from The LU Gazette

Just One Look...#119

Straight Spouses Advocate Same-Sex Marriage

SAN FRANCISCO — Wah Cheong, a lifelong Republican and the soon-to-be divorced father of two teenage boys, sometimes surprises his co-workers and neighbors in a relatively conservative community outside San Francisco when he says he supports same-sex marriage.
"Here is my situation," the 47-year-old chemical engineer tells them when the hot-button topic comes up. "If gays and lesbians were more accepted, I wouldn't have married a closeted lesbian."
Silence usually follows. Then, a spark of understanding.
Of all the constituency groups that advocate allowing gay couples to wed, none is perhaps more counterintuitive than the heterosexual spouses of gay men and lesbians.
Yet as the issue plays out in the nation's courtrooms and statehouses, some of the wives and husbands who learned that their partner was attracted to other women or men are making their voices known in the often-polarized debate.
"We are the unacknowledged victims of the victims of homophobia," said Amity Pierce Buxton, the founder of the Straight Spouse Network, a New Jersey-based support and advocacy group with 52 U.S. chapters. "When gays and lesbians feel they have to get married to be accepted and to have kids, that hurts not only gays and lesbians, but straight spouses and kids."
The board of the volunteer-run organization, which claims thousands of participants, has adopted a policy of opposing laws that limit marriage to a man and a woman. Last fall, as California voters considered whether to amend the state Constitution to outlaw same-sex marriages, Buxton, 80, who lives in Oakland, wrote an impassioned opinion piece arguing against Proposition 8.
Some network participants have marched in gay pride parades, tried to persuade church groups that the Bible should not be used to justify anti-gay attitudes, and met with groups of gay fathers struggling to stay on good terms with their ex-wives. Others have expressed their views on talk shows when married politicians like former New Jersey Gov. Jim McGreevey come out or are outed, or just quietly shared their perspectives in hope of changing a few minds.
To be sure, not all mates who discover they are in what has become known as "mixed-orientation marriages" are so sanguine. Cheong, who was married for more than 17 years when his wife told him she thought she was a lesbian, said he knows other straight spouses who voted for California's same-sex marriage ban "out of spite for their ex's, nothing else."
Regardless of where they are on the acceptance scale, each spouse can pinpoint devastating moments of discovery or disclosure that rendered their marital relationships unrecognizable, if not shattered.
For Carolyn Sega Lowengart, 61, who lives outside Washington, D.C., it came after 31 years of marriage. Lowengart thinks if her husband had not seen his sexual orientation as a stigma, both of them would have been free to pursue other relationships.
After her husband moved out, "I asked him, 'When did you know'"' He said, 'When I was a teenager.' I said, 'Why did you marry me?' And he said, 'Because I didn't want to be (gay),'" she said.
Randy Spires, 59, a former military police officer who lives in Southern Maryland, said he went through it on his 21st wedding anniversary when he found an e-mail his wife had sent to her female lover. Compounding his anger and confusion were the reactions of straight male friends who joked that Spires was lucky to be married to a lesbian.
"I've always compared the straight spouses with a chalk line at a crime scene," said Spires. "The gay and lesbian community doesn't want to associate with us because they think we are angry or what do you have to worry about, you're straight. And then you have the heterosexual side saying wait a minute, there must be something wrong with you for this to happen. We lose our own identity. We don't have a face."
Spires' ex-wife, Sue Spires, says she regrets having hurt Randy but does not completely understand why, 13 years later, he feels a need to talk about the end of their marriage, which produced two sons. But she agrees with him that if same-sex relationships had been more accepted when they were young, she would have had a relationship with a woman.
"I knew I was gay from the time I was 8-years-old," she said. "But the socially correct thing to do was to get married. That's what I did. We didn't have an unhappy marriage, but if I could do it again I would be able to tell him, 'No, I'm sorry, I can't go through with this."
Buxton, whose 1991 book, "The Other Side of the Closet," is considered the definitive work on the topic, estimates there are as many as 2 million gay men and lesbians in the United States are or have been in heterosexual marriages. About seven out of every 10 involve women married to gay men, she said.
Of those who contact the Straight Spouse Network — the organization hears from five new straight spouses a day — about one-third immediately split up when the gay partner comes out. Another third stay together for a year or two. The remaining third resolve to make their marriages work.
Citrus Heights, Calif. residents Jim and Anne Marie Will are in the last category. Former high school sweethearts, they had been together for 15 years and married for 11 years when Jim told his wife in 2001 that he thought he was gay but had never acted on his feelings.
The couple, who have a 16-year-old daughter, decided to stay together and to give both of them the option to pursue sexual relationships outside the marriage, which Jim Will has done. Yet the bond between them remains strong, if unconventional.
When asked why they have remained married, both spouses say there is no one else with whom they would rather share their lives.
"Being open and honest relieved my burden of guilt and we were able to consider ways to safely accommodate my additional desires. There continues to be no one else we want to have a life with," Jim Hill said.
"The one thing I have asked him to do for me is to not hook up with other gay married men," Anne Marie Hill said. "I have seen the devastation these women have gone through, and I don't want him to be part of that."
from The Associated Press

Boyfriend's Gay Video Freaks Out Female Mate

Q. I have been with my boyfriend for over five years and have caught him watching soft core porn and buying skin mags before. It hurts me to know that I am not enough to keep his attention, but a few days ago I found something that really broke my heart - a guy-on-guy porn DVD hidden in our bedroom. I freaked out when I found it. When he got home from work, he told me it was because he had been having guy-on-guy dreams, so he bought the DVD to see if it did anything for him. He says he watched it twice and was relieved it didn't do anything for him. I know he had a sexual experience with a guy when he was younger, which he says was nothing. But he's asked me to do things like wear a strap-on, which I never did because that creeped me out. I don't know if his dreams stemmed from built-up sexual tension because we haven't had sex in a long time, but he always wants me when we do. If he was gay, he shouldn't get excited from kissing me or looking at me in sexy underwear. He said he was really freaked out by the dreams, confused and scared. Could he be bi? How common is it for men to be curious about other men? -- HIDING UNDER THE BED

A. Either your boyfriend is confused and trying to figure things out, or he knows and doesn't know how to talk to you about it. If you freak out, I can understand why he might be afraid to discuss these issues with you. He is probably embarrassed that you found his stash, and when you lost your mind over it, you solidified his belief that you wouldn't understand. If you didn't like him watching porn, you should have brought it up at the time rather than let it fester. As a rule, guys don't watch gay porn unless they are gay. Just because he enjoys non-traditional play in the bedroom doesn't mean he is gay or even bisexual, but if you have concerns, talk to him about them rather than screaming.
Guys are funny sometimes. If they have a dream about another guy, they may doubt their orientation and do whatever they feel necessary to figure out the truth. You said that he had an experience with another boy when he was young. While not uncommon for youth, it could be significant for him. As long as it wasn't an abusive situation, he was probably experimenting. Can you honestly say you have never had a dream or a fantasy -- about someone of the same sex?
As far as him getting turned on by you, that doesn't guarantee anything other than he is human, and yes, possibly bisexual. To get to the bottom of this discuss it with him. You could spy on him, but that brings up trust issues (not to mention you may look like a nut). If it is impacting him as much as you say it is, he would benefit from some support as well. And something to think about: if he watched the movie once and it did nothing for him, you might want to ask yourself why he watched it a second time?
from The London Free Press

Penis Pump Judge Loses Bid For Benefits

OKLAHOMA CITY - A former Creek County judge who went to prison for indecent exposure has lost an attempt to get back his judicial retirement pay.
Donald Thompson was getting benefits after his retirement in 2004 until his 2006 conviction.
The Oklahoma Public Employees Retirement System cut off the benefits and said he violated an oath to faithfully discharge his duties when he used a penis pump in court.
On Friday, Oklahoma County District Judge Patricia Parrish upheld the denial of benefits.
Thompson plans to appeal to the state Supreme Court.
Records show his retirement pay at the time of the forfeiture was $7,789 a month.
His attorneys said he should get at least some of his benefits because of his clean conduct as a judge before misconduct was alleged. He was appointed in 1982.
from KOCO

Matador To Advertise Gay Drink On Cape

MADRID, SPAIN — A little-known Spanish matador is breaking with a sacred tradition, agreeing to advertise on his cape while slaying bulls and endorse a soft drink that caters to gays.
Matador Joselito Ortega will be plugging a club-scene energy beverage called Gay Up and have those words embroidered into his cape in large, red cursive letters.
In Spain, matadors are seen by many as the pinnacle of macho, and Ortega's agreeing to endorse a product geared toward gay men is raising eyebrows.
But Ortega sees no incompatibility.
"I am a bullfighter. That is not going to change. I am going to go out into the ring as I have done until now, to risk my life, and the seven goring wounds on my body prove that," he told The AP Wednesday. "If the gay community welcomes me as an image or a symbol, that is fine."
Topflight Spanish bullfighters are celebrities, just like football or movie stars, and it is common for them to have commercial endorsement gigs for everything from wine to cars to fancy clothes. But it is almost unprecedented for them to advertise something while in the arena.
Bullfighting writers said the only case they recall is that of a matador named Luis Reina, who signed a deal in the 1980s with the Japanese electronics giant Akai and had that brand name embroidered on the sleeves and legs of the glittering 'traje de luces,' or suits of lights, that he wore while fighting.
No one expects Ortega to start a trend. It would border on scandalous for a top-rated bullfighter to advertise from the ring.
Gay Up is a new product in Spain, developed by firm based in the southern city of Malaga that bought the European rights to it from a manufacturer in Colombia. There, it was made from strawberries. But the Spanish firm decided that to make it a hit with gays in Europe it needed to be an energy drink, said Jose Maria Terron, the company's president.
"The fact that it is oriented toward the gay community stems more than anything from its name," Terron said.
Both he and Ortega said the advertising cape is a good way to shake up bullfighting, which they described as steeped in male bravado.
"It is a matter of changing what is normal, or usual, within this world that seem so untouchable," Ortega said.
Ortega is hardly a superstar. He became a full-fledged matador in 2006 but has been hampered by repeated and serious gorings and has not fought often, said Juan Belmonte, a bullfighting critic for TV station Canal Sur in Seville.
Belmonte said those who criticize Ortega's Gay Up deal will be angry not so much because the product is geared toward homosexuals but because Ortega is advertising in the arena, violating a tradition.
"It is like prostituting the cape," Belmonte said.
from The Associated Press

Just One Look...#118

Gay, Bisexual Teens At Risk For Eating Disorders

NEW YORK - Gay, lesbian and bisexual teenagers may be at higher risk of binge-eating and purging than their heterosexual peers, starting as early as age 12, a new study finds.
Past research has found connections between sexual orientation and the risk of eating disorders in adults -- showing, for instance, that gay men have higher rates of symptoms than their heterosexual counterparts.
Less has been known about how sexual orientation affects teenagers' risks of various eating disorders.
For the new study, researchers at Harvard University and Children's Hospital Boston used data from a U.S. survey of nearly 14,000 12- to 23-year-olds to look at the relationship between sexual orientation and binge-eating and purging.
They found heightened rates of binge-eating among both males and females who identified themselves as gay, lesbian, bisexual or "mostly heterosexual."
Purging, by vomiting or abusing laxatives, was also more common among these teens, the researchers report in the Journal of Adolescent Health.
"We found clear and concerning signs of higher rates of eating disorder symptoms in sexual-minority youth compared to their heterosexual peers even at ages as young as 12, 13 or 14 years old," lead researcher S. Bryn Austin, an assistant professor of pediatrics, told Reuters Health in an email.
Among females, lesbian, bisexual and mostly heterosexual respondents were all about twice as likely as their heterosexual counterparts to report binge-eating at least once per month in the past year.
Bisexual and mostly heterosexual girls and women were also more likely to say they had purged in the past year in order to control their weight.
Among males, the highest risks were seen among homosexuals -- who were seven times more likely to report bingeing and nearly 12 times more likely to report purging than heterosexual males.
Bisexual and mostly heterosexual boys and men also had elevated risks of both problems -- with rates anywhere from three to seven times higher than those of their heterosexual counterparts.
The survey data do not offer a potential reason for the findings, but past studies give some insight, according to the researchers.
"We know that gay, lesbian, and other sexual-minority kids are often under a lot of pressure," Austin said, noting that these teens are often "treated like outsiders" in their own families and schools, and may be excluded, harassed or victimized by bullies.
"This kind of isolation and victimization can take its toll on a young person," Austin explained, "and one of ways it can play out is in vulnerability to eating-disorder symptoms and a host of other stress-related health problems."
She added that because negative attitudes and discrimination against sexual minorities are still pervasive in society, families need to be a source of support.
It is "incredibly important," Austin said, "for parents and other family members to reach out and make sure these youth know they are loved and supported, that they can count on their families to stay by their side."
from Reuters

Telling Your Co-Workers You're Gay

I finally watched the film Milk this summer. I loved the movie and was enthralled by Sean Penn's performance. But I couldn't help but feel a bit disheartened about how little some things have changed in the 31 years since Harvey Milk's assassination.
Sure, same-sex marriage is now legal in a handful of the United States and same-sex domestic partnerships enjoy the same employment perks as heterosexual ones at many forward-thinking companies. But between Proposition 8 being overturned in California, conservative forces using Referendum 71 to try to overturn Washington state's same-sex domestic partnership laws, and gays in the military still expected to keep mum about their sex lives, progress seems glacial at times.
In July, Wall Street Journal columnist Alexandra Levit offered up these sobering statistics:
"A recent Harris poll conducted with Out & Equal and Witeck-Combs Communications indicated that 44% of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) participants feel unable to talk freely to co-workers about their partners, and up to 78% don't feel comfortable bringing their partners to corporate social functions."
Admittedly, I've always worked for LGBT-friendly employers. So I haven't witnessed firsthand an officemate having to hide the details of his or her personal life.
Curious about where my gay and lesbian pals now stood on coming out at work, I took an informal poll. Their answers ran the gamut: Those with gay-friendly employers didn't bat an eye at putting a picture of their partner on their desk or bringing them to company events. But some who worked in much more of a "don't ask, don't tell" environment kept quiet about their personal lives.
"I'd love to give you a quote using my real name," said one pal who works in academia. "But I'm trying to get tenure and I don't want to do anything to jeopardize that."
A few responses took me completely by surprise:
"I'm not flamboyant, but it was obvious from the start that I was gay," said Michael, a pal from the San Francisco Bay Area who works at a boutique car dealership, a workplace he says is pretty macho and prone lots of locker room talk.
"I never hid my partner at all," Michael continued. "My co-workers have all met him, and he's always included in dinners and parties."
What about his straight co-workers' boasts of their latest dating conquests?
"I give it right back to them, and everyone takes it and laughs," said Michael, who's well aware that he and his colleagues could never get away with that much oversharing at other companies.
Say what you will about a bunch of bored office guys getting lewd around the water cooler, but the fact that my friend doesn't have to worry about his professional reputation -- or worse, his personal safety -- for crowing right along with them is progress.
from The Seattle Times

Science Fails To Explain Humanity

PROVO, UTAH - We are so used to the idea that science can give us answers that we rarely even challenge the assumption. But according to Daniel N. Robinson, an Oxford University philosophy professor and author, we need much more than scientific facts to answer the question, "What is a human being?"
Robinson used the shifting attitudes about homosexuality and imaginary visitors from Mars to illustrate how science falls short when explaining human individuals.
"It is more or less taken for granted, by persons facing the moral and social dimensions of life in the modern world, that the surest guide to the right decisions and the right attitudes will be supplied by science," Robinson said at the Truman G. Madsen Eternal Man Lecture, sponsored by BYU's Wheatley Institution.
Robinson demonstrated the problem through an imaginary visitor from Mars who came to find out what types of creatures live here. After consulting with scientists, the visitor returns to Mars to give his report. "A human being is a body that is 50 to 75 percent water. The percentage of water depends on the total amount of fat. On average, each human being is comprised of enough sodium chloride to fill three salt shakers. In the infant stage, the average amount of potassium is between seven and eight grams."
"The question that arises, obviously," Robinson said, "is whether the Martian community, in possession of all these facts, has even the foggiest notion of just what a human being is! Offered as an answer to the question, 'What is a human being?' this body of facts constitutes a deception -- a falsehood. ... these are 'false facts.'"
Only about 30 years ago, an essay by Gerald C. Davison argued that homosexuality should not be treated as a disease. Instead, Davison argued that homosexuality should be treated so patients could achieve more social acceptability. Robinson said that Davison's essay had no assumption that homosexuality was immutable and couldn't be changed.
Today the focus is on whether the homosexual impulse is inborn or even changeable. Robinson pointed to a 1991 article by Simon LeVay that found a difference in the hypothalamus structure between homosexual and heterosexual men.
"I think it is fair to say, that had such a finding been available in the 1950s, it would have been conclusive proof that homosexuality is a pathological condition, as evidenced by the homosexual's 'abnormal' cellular morphology," Robinson said.
Robinson then wondered aloud whether those homosexuals who have embraced a heterosexual lifestyle have also had a concomitant change in their hypothalamus. He asked this question, he said, to illustrate the simplification that scientists apply to the human condition.
"I offer these remarks on the scientific understanding of homosexuality to make clear that the (commonly accepted) 'facts' of science not only carry cultural and political weight -- no matter how carefully concealed -- but very often seem to be shaped and even 'discovered' by way of factors that are themselves ineliminably political," he said.
Human behavior and human values are filtered in the social sciences to serve political ends, according to Robinson. "It is to abandon the mission to understand in favor of the impulse to control."
Reducing explanations to their simplest forms has a purpose in science, but the danger is to take too much away that can explain the human condition. There is an "alphabet of man" according to Robinson -- a collection of the needful things for understanding humanity. Take away a vowel or a consonant and understanding is impossible.
Robinson believes there is more to mankind that mere facts. "All animals provide some form of shelter for themselves, but this surely is not a model of the Acropolis or the Cathedral at Chartres, neither of which was intended for shelter. Patterns of aggression are found throughout the animal kingdom, but only we are prepared to die for a principle, for a belief in something higher and more significant than our individual lives."
There is something in mankind that can't be named, quantified or measured according to Robinson. "If we attempt to hold it in consciousness, it darts away. ... It seems to be repelled by what is merely earthly. Those of its features which we can glimpse more readily in other lives than in our own suggest at once a moral and aesthetic dimension," he said. "When this is sensed or felt, no matter how fleetingly, there seems to be an expansion of the very terms of life itself."
from The Mormon Times

Teen Sentenced In Beating Of Gay Boy

KALAMAZOO, MICHIGAN - One of two teens accused of beating a gay 15-year-old Portage boy was sentenced Monday to take part in a special program at the Kalamazoo County Juvenile Home that could last nine months.
The 16-year-old defendant also was ordered to obtain anger-management counseling, pay victim restitution and write a letter of apology to the victim, Steven Harmon, said Karen Hayter, division leader for assistant prosecuting attorneys in the Family Division of Kalamazoo County Circuit Court.
Steven was punched repeatedly by the 16-year-old boy and a 15-year-old boy in mid-August in a Portage parking lot.
Steven has said that the attackers called him "faggot," "queer" and other derogatory terms.
The 16-year-old defendant, whom the Gazette is not identifying because of his age, pleaded guilty to aggravated assault. He has been held in the Juvenile Home since Aug. 13, Hayter said.
The 15-year-old boy also is charged with aggravated assault. His next court date is Oct. 5.
Steven has said that he and a 17-year-old female friend and her 5-year-old nephew were walking home when he was hit in the head and face about 20 times by the two boys. His friend eventually shielded him from more punches.
from The Kalamazoo Gazette

TV Dance Show Makes Peace With Gay Community

LOS ANGELES - Popular reality TV show "So You Think You Can Dance" has made peace with America's gay community by putting a same-sex Latin ballroom couple into a new round of competition and appointing an openly gay judge.
Producer and judge Nigel Lythgoe caused a furor in May when he told another gay couple he thought their samba routine would "probably alienate" a lot of the show's five million viewers.
Lythgoe later wrote a Twitter message saying he was "not a fan of 'Brokeback' Ballroom," alluding to the 2007 gay romance film "Brokeback Mountain." His message prompted a call for action by the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD), a meeting with Lythgoe and executives at the Fox network, as well as an apology.
The Emmy-award winning "So You Think You Can Dance" currently in its 6th season on Fox, uses a format similar to singing contest "American Idol" to chose America's favorite dancer through a mix of judges' decisions and public votes.
On Wednesday's episode, Jason and Willem De Vries danced an emotional audition routine, causing choreographer and judge Mia Michaels to tear up and drawing a compliment from Lythgoe.
"I celebrate the courage that you guys have to just expose yourselves and your hearts and your passion and who you are," Michaels told them.
The pair told the panel they were determined to show the judges and America there is "a world of same-sex dancers."
Lythgoe, who started his career in Britain as a dancer, told the pair; "Thank you for showing me that same-sex ballroom dancing can be very strong and very good."
But to get through to the grueling next round in Las Vegas, De Vries and Jason had to prove they could dance other styles in a choreography test that also paired them with female contestants. The Top 20 finalists usually perform in male/female pairings.
Their inclusion followed the appointment to the "So You Think You Can Dance" judging panel earlier this week of Adam Shankman, an openly gay choreographer and director of the 2007 movie "Hairspray".
GLAAD president Jarrett Barrios said on Thursday that the treatment of Jason and De Vries on the show and the addition of Shankman "gives America a bold example of how to treat gay people with the same respect and fairness as everyone else."
from Reuters

The Night I Told My Father I'm Gay

On September 17, 2000, correctional officer Alvin S. Glenn was murdered during an escape attempt at the Richland County Detention Center. He was the first correctional officer in over 50 years to be murdered during an escape attempt.
In his honor, the Richland County Detention Center was renamed the Alvin S. Glenn Detention Center.
That's all very good, but speaking as one of his children, I would rather have my father back.
When I told my father, Alvin S. Glenn, that I'm gay, I didn't come out and say it.
I really should have though. My father was a former military man. He served 29 years in the United States Army and had an aversion to being dramatic. No tears, no dramatic pauses, and no beating around the bush. Just say what you need to say and be done with it.
But to say that I was nervous as we drove to the grocery store was an understatement.
"Pop, I said. I don't think you need to worry about grandchildren when it comes to me."
Granted, that this was during the time when I inaccurately thought being gay meant that you could not have a family complete with little rugrats (I say that word with much affection) running all over the place. I figured that statement was the best way the best way to break the news to him.
My father, however, said three words to me that made it all unnecessary:
"I knew that already."
To tell the truth, I was a little shocked. But I really shouldn't have been. No matter how I try, I'm not the most butch fellow in the world.
Maybe it's my diva fascination.
During Halloween in second grade, I borrowed my mother's ratty bathroom, my aunt's cold cream and went as Bette Davis in the dressing room scene of All About Eve.
When I was in fifth grade, I had a Diana Ross fascination.
By seventh grade, Ms. Ross was replaced by Stevie Nicks.
So needless to say that I'm not exactly the "straight-acting" gay man type.
But still, my father saying that he already knew that I'm gay floored me. Apparently he and my younger brother had been discussing the matter for some time before I came out to him.
After the revealing that he already knew of my sexual orientation, my father proceeded to tell me that while he does not particularly understand why I am gay, he accepted me as his son.
I didn't have a problem with his honesty because of two reasons. I wanted my father to be honest concerning how he felt. If you can't be honest with family, then who can you be honest with?
Secondly, he never rejected me. This was probably because my father and I didn't spend that much time together as we should have. We only really got to know each other during my first year in college.
Still, the main thing was the fact that he made it clear that I was still his son. Forget this mess about "God doesn't want you to be that way," or "how could you do this to the family."
By the way, my father wasn't that squeamish about my relationships either. I even got to introduce him to the man I was dating at the time.
Today, the day of my father's death, haunts me and it will continue to do so until my dying day. But it doesn't get me as sad as it used to.
I hate how my father was taken from me but I'm blessed to have known him and to have spent as much time as I did with him.
I was very lucky to have Alvin S. Glenn as my father.
He was a pretty cool guy.
from Holy Bullies and Headless Monsters / Alvin McEwen

Newlywed Game Features First Gay Couple

NEW YORK - Even as states and jurisdictions made gay and lesbian marriages legal, "The Newlywed Game" has played it straight - until now.
The long-running game show, now on the GSN cable network, said Wednesday it will feature its first gay couple this season on a celebrity edition. George Takei, who played Mr. Sulu on "Star Trek," will appear with his partner, Brad Altman.
They just celebrated their first anniversary after being married in Los Angeles last September, but they're nothing like the giggly young couples the game is known for. Takei and Altman have been together for 22 years.
"What we want is to display the normality and the joy of having a happy union," Takei said.
"The Newlywed Game" has been on TV off and on since it premiered in prime-time on ABC in 1967, mostly with Bob Eubanks as host. Singer Carnie Wilson is now host of the show, which is in its second season on GSN and done well in the ratings for the network.
The show always teased and tested couples about how well they know each other, with the slightly lascivious Eubanks delighting in questions about "making whoopee."
It has since featured older couples, interracial couples and some who have lived together many years before marriage. Even long-ago contestants were retested as part of "Oldyweds Game" segments.
Kelly Goode, GSN's programming chief, said she couldn't speculate on why gay couples were never included in the past because GSN, the former Game Show Network, has only been responsible for the show for two years. She said it was in the game's rules that the couple needed to have a legally-recognized marriage to play.
The change "made sense for GSN," Goode said. "It seems like the show has always reflected the times in terms of marriages depicted and this felt like the next logical step."
Takei and Altman haven't taped their episode yet but expect to do so soon. GSN hopes to air in October.
The show is sprinkling a handful of celebrity players and their new spouses in this season, including Davy Jones of The Monkees, Christopher Knight of "The Brady Bunch" and Jonny Fairplay of "Survivor."
Wilson said she had been pressing behind-the-scenes to have an all-gay edition of the show. She's excited about Takei's appearance.
"It's needed at this point," she said. "To me, this is not anything political. This is not a political statement. This show has always been about couples and how well they know each other."
Dan Gainor, a vice president at the conservative Culture and Media Institute, said the move was a publicity stunt for a show most Americans didn't realize was still on the air. Despite Wilson's views, Gainor said he believed it was a political statement for the California-based show and network, coming in a state where voters banned same-sex nuptials months after Takei and Altman married.
"They're trying to use TV and the movies to set the gay agenda and make it mainstream," Gainor said.
Even though they've been a committed couple for 22 years, Takei said he and Altman are quietly preparing for their appearance. He's taking careful note of what his partner orders in restaurants and wears.
"To be included in something we never felt we'd be included in is very satisfying," he said.
from The Associated Press

The Meaning Of Matthew

NEW YORK - The story of Matthew Shepard is now synonymous with gay rights. But before his grisly murder in 1998, Matthew was simply Judy Shepard's son.
Now an international gay rights activist, Judy Shepard's new book, "The Meaning of Matthew: My Son's Murder in Laramie and a World Transformed," is being published for the 10-year anniversary of his murder.
On "The Early Show" Tuesday, Judy warned that her new book is not an easy read.
The author said writing about her son, who was beaten and tied to a fence for being gay, brought back a lot of difficult memories.
"I thought a lot of those memories, I wouldn't have to go back to them," she said. "Digging it all up was a lot harder than I thought it was going to be."
Judy said she wrote the book to get at the truth of Matthew's life.
"It's our family's truth," she said. "And I make it very clear that they're our memories that may be remembered differently by other people, but this is our Matt and I felt it was time to introduce the Matt known to his family and friends to the Matthew that everybody else thinks they know."
Rodriguez read a passage from the book:
"There was blood everywhere, in a pool under his head and all across his face. Matted in his hair and caked around his nostrils, except for the tracks on each of his cheeks that had been left by tears."
Rodriguez asked Judy how she has dealt with that pain over the years. Has anything brought her peace the last 10 years amid the loss of her son?
"It's just day-by-day still," Judy said. "It's a horrible pain. ... What's happened is you don't really move on. It's just different. You remember different things. And in beginning it was the horror and anguish of losing Matt and worrying about the pain that he was feeling at the time. Now we talk about Matt and the happy memories that we have of him. So that's the good transition."
She added, "I miss his hugs."
From Matthew's murder, however, Judy said a lot of unintended education has occurred in the press.
"People were made aware of what was going on in the gay community and it started a national dialogue," she said. "And then the production of "The Laramie Project" sort of kept that dialogue going and I think people are just more aware, there's a lot more information available now. The gay community was part of every public discussion where it used to be something you didn't talk about -- in the closet, if you will."
Since Matt died, Judy has lobbied for a hate-crime bill called The Matthew Shepard Act. She said she hopes the Obama administration and Congress will pass it into law.
"We know the president will sign it if the bill comes to his desk," she said. "It's attached to a Department of Defense bill, so that makes it trickier. Just keeping my fingers crossed."
Judy said she hopes her book and Matt's story will encourage parents to love their children no matter what.
She said, "(Children shouldn't) feel anything other than just love and encouragement from their parents."
from CBS

Tim Hardaway Now Works To Save Young Gay Lives

MIAMI, FLORIDA - Former Miami Heat guard Tim Hardaway, who in 2007 wrecked his post-basketball career by declaring on radio "I hate gay people,'' will co-sponsor a South Beach fundraiser Sunday for The Trevor Project -- a national suicide prevention group for gay youth.
"Gays and lesbians, we don't have to accept the act, but we have to accept them as people. Especially children, we don't want them to kill themselves. We want them to live their lives as they want to,'' said Hardaway, who took several training sessions at YES Institute, a local anti-suicide group for gay youth.
After the anti-gay rant, Hardaway lost his advertising endorsements and income.
"The endorsements will never come back. People have taken that and it's gone. I understand that. I'm trying to look for work and provide for my family,'' he said. "All that stuff has left me high and dry. I have to dig for work.''
Hardaway has repeatedly apologized for what he said, but still wants to know who's gay in the locker room:
"We have a right to know. We'd say, `How do you want to do this? Do you want to go into the shower first, or do you want me to go into the shower first?' ''
Back then, he wouldn't have showered with a gay teammate, but today he might.
"I've probably already done it and not even known it.''
from The Miami Herald

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No Ukrainian Adoption For Elton John

KIEV, UKRAINE - Elton John won't be able to adopt a 14-month-old HIV-positive child from Ukraine because the pop star is too old and isn't married, the government said Monday.
Adoption and gay rights advocates expressed regret about the determination by Family, Youth and Sports Minister Yuriy Pavlenko, while a children's charity had reservations about John's weekend announcement that he and his male partner, David Furnish, wanted to adopt the boy.
John announced his desire after meeting the boy, named Lev, while touring an orphanage Saturday as part of an anti-AIDS charity project.
"I don't know how we do that, but he has stolen my heart. And he has stolen David's heart and it would be wonderful if we can have a home," John said.
But Pavlenko told The Associated Press that the adoption will not happen because adoptive parents must be married and because the pop star is too old.
The singer is 62 and Ukrainian law requires a parent to be no more than 45 years older than an adopted child.
John and Furnish tied the knot in 2005 in one of the first legalized civil unions in Britain, but Pavlenko said Ukraine does not recognize gays unions as marriage.
"Elton John will not be able to adopt a Ukrainian child and if he files that request we will unfortunately deny it," Pavlenko said. "The law is the same for everybody: for a president, for a minister, for Elton John."
John spokesman Gary Farrow declined to comment.
Pavlenko said Ukraine was grateful for the singer's charity work and expressed hope that his desire to adopt Lev would spur the domestic adoption of more children with health problems, which is still rare in Ukraine.
Pavlenko said domestic adoptions have increased significantly thanks to government childcare supplements and maternity leave for adoptive families. In 2004, Ukrainian families adopted about 1,500 children compared with 2,500 adoptions by foreigners. This year, 2,500 orphans were adopted locally while 1,000 found homes abroad.
However, Ukrainians are still reluctant to adopt ill, psychologically challenged children or those older than 10. Pavlenko said that only about 30 HIV-positive children have been adopted since 2007. About 32,000 Ukrainian orphans are waiting to be adopted this year, but only 2,000 Ukrainian families are lined to adopt them.
Albert Pavlov, head of the Happy Child foundation for orphaned and sick children in Zaporizhia, said he opposed adoption by gays, but called for removing age and marriage restrictions for adopters.
"I don't understand why a middle-aged single woman, if she is in good health, cannot raise a child," Pavlov said.
Svyatoslav Sheremet, head of Ukraine's Gay Forum, a leading gay rights organization in Ukraine, said the regulations were depriving the boy of a chance to find a family and love.
"If I were that child, I would feel very bitter and sad," Sheremet said.
Yukie Mokuo, UNICEF representative in Ukraine, said that foreign adoptions should be encouraged when no local families can be found.
But charity Save the Children UK, which also expressed misgivings over Madonna's adoption of a girl from Malawi, said celebrity adoptions risked sending the wrong message about how best to help foreign children.
"International adoption can actually exacerbate the problem it hopes to solve" by encouraging parents to abandon children in the hope of giving them a better life, spokesman Adrian Lovett said.
"Most orphans in institutions, including in Ukraine, have one or both parents still living, or have an extended family that could care for them with the right support," Lovett said in a statement.
from The Associated Press

Busboys Sue Male Boss For Making Unwanted Sexual Advances

NEW YORK - Three busboys and other staff at an upscale Italian eatery in midtown said their supervisor molested them between orders of pricey pasta, a federal lawsuit claims.
Busboy Moises Pastor said he was just 15 years old when Oscar Velandia, a boss at Remi on E. 53rd St., started grabbing his groin and making unwanted sexual advances, the lawsuit filed Friday in Manhattan federal court claims.
Pastor, who is now 18, said Velandia turned the restaurant tip pool into a sex-for-cash system, demanding Pastor allow him to perform oral sex on him when he wanted an advance, the suit says.
Another busboy, Franciso Sotarriba, said Velandia never eased up on his sexual come-ons or grabbing him even after Sotarriba refused his boss' demands for sex, the suit says.
Arturo Caravantes, a 16-year employee of the restaurant, claimed he was fired in August 2008 after he tried to organize his fellow workers.
Caravantes said he feared he would lose his job if he didn't give in to Velandia's chronic demands for oral sex.
from The New York Daily News

The Rights Of Gay Employees

It is remarkable how little progress gay people have made in securing the basic protection against discrimination on the job. In 29 states, it is still legal to fire workers for being gay. But momentum is building in Congress for the first federal law banning such discrimination against gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people.
Federal law has lagged behind the reality of American life. There are now openly gay members of Congress from between-the-coasts states like Colorado and Wisconsin. And according to the Human Rights Campaign, a gay-rights advocacy group, 85 percent of Fortune 500 companies have policies protecting gay employees from discrimination.
But gay rights advocates have for years faced opposition to a federal civil rights law from the religious right, and from parts of the business community, who argue that it would lead to a flood of litigation.
Bipartisan bills have been introduced in both the House of Representatives and the Senate, modeled on existing civil rights laws that cover race, religion and sex. Unlike some past bills, these include gender identity, protecting transgender people from discrimination.
The bills were written to meet some of the concerns of opponents. The law would not apply to religious organizations, or to businesses with fewer than 15 employees. It would not allow for quotas or “disparate impact” lawsuits, which generally use statistical disparities to prove discrimination.
There is reason for cautious optimism. In 2007, the House passed a nondiscrimination law that did not cover transgender people. The current Congress is more Democratic, and even in the past two years, gay rights have made significant strides. As states and localities have passed antidiscrimination laws, it has been clear that they do not disrupt the workplace, and they have not resulted in an enormous number of lawsuits.
Supporters in the House think they have the votes. The biggest hurdle is likely to be winning the support of 60 senators, the de facto number now required for most legislation because of filibuster rules.
People who believe in workplace fairness should lobby senators to get on board. It is unacceptable that in a nation committed to equality people can still be fired in more than half the states for being gay. Congressional leaders should make passing the Employment Non-Discrimination Act a top priority.
from The New York Times

Just One Look...#117

Atlanta Gay Bar Raided

ATLANTA, GEORGIA - The owners of an Atlanta gay bar say their establishment was unfairly targeted by police conducting a raid Thursday evening.
Several customers at Atlanta Eagle say they were harassed without prompting. They were forced to the ground and frisked, according to several witnesses.
"Our problem is with the way our customers were treated," said one of the Eagle's owners, Richard Ramey.
Eight employees of the bar were arrested around 11:30 p.m., charged with providing adult entertainment without a city permit.
“I’m thinking, this is Stonewall. It’s like I stepped into the wrong decade,” said Nick Koperski, 31, who had just gotten to the bar when the raid, involving more than a dozen police officers, some in plain clothes, commenced. Patrons at the Stonewall Inn staged a series of riots against New York police in 1969, saying they were routinely harassed because of their sexual orientation. The protests are credited with kick starting the modern gay rights movement.
In a statement released early Friday evening, the APD said the city "received several complaints with descriptive information about alleged criminal conduct at the Atlanta Eagle Club located at 306 Ponce De Leon."
Eagle co-owner Robert Kelley was among those arrested Thursday, and six of the eight remained behind bars until late Friday afternoon, when two Atlanta City Council candidates, Miguel Gallegos and Shelitha Robertson, intervened, contacting a judge who then set bail.
Eagle bartender Chris Lopez said, “Before I knew it I was being handcuffed to [Robert Kelley]. They were going from patron to patron, having everyone turn out their pockets.”
Danni Lynn Harris, Atlanta Police's liaison to the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered community, said the volume of complaints she's received from Eagle customers suggest an investigation is warranted.
The raid, conducted by the vice squad, was a result of a tip sent to Mayor Shirley Franklin's office alleging “illicit sex” at The Eagle, Harris said. Ironically, Franklin's election and re-election campaigns were headquartered in space adjoining the leather bar.
Harris said no drugs were found, and none of those arrested face narcotics charges.
“It just doesn’t make any sense, with all the bad stuff that’s going on in the city,” Lopez said. “It felt like they had to justify [the raid].”
Lopez said he didn’t hear any anti-gay epithets from the officers, as has been alleged in several complaints made to Harris.
“What I’ve been hearing is a lot of people saying they were verbally abused, with anti-gay overtones,” the LGBT liaison said.
Koperski also said he also didn’t hear any homophobic insults, “but that doesn’t mean they didn’t say it.”
“I’ve never heard about something like this at a straight establishment,” he said. “I do believe it was prejudicial.”
A rally opposing the raid has been organized for 5 p.m. Sunday at the bar.
“I’m concerned it’s going to be one of those things that blow up before all the facts are known,” Harris said.
Ramey, who said The Eagle has never had trouble with police before, said he may pursue legal action following the raid.
“How can I just sit here and let them get away with doing this to my customers?” he said.
The APD statement acknowledged "allegations of improper behavior by police officers conducting the investigation" but added no official complaints have been filed with the department.
from The Atlanta Journal-Constitution

Prime Minister Issues Apology To Alan Turing

UNITED KINGDOM - Prime Minister Gordon Brown has released a statement on the Second World War code-breaker and brilliant mathematician Alan Turing, recognising the ‘appalling’ way he was treated due to his sexuality.
Turing worked at The University of Manchester from 1948 to 1954 and made significant contributions to the emerging field of artificial intelligence and computing.
While at Manchester, Turing worked on the Manchester Mark 1, one of the first recognisable modern computers.
Turing was convicted of ‘gross indecency’ in 1952 and underwent chemical castration as part of his punishment.
Gordon Brown’s statement came in response to a petition posted on the Number 10 website which has received thousands of signatures in recent months.
In the statement Brown said: “Turing was a quite brilliant mathematician, most famous for his work on breaking the German Enigma codes. It is no exaggeration to say that, without his outstanding contribution, the history of World War Two could well have been very different. He truly was one of those individuals we can point to whose unique contribution helped to turn the tide of war.
“The debt of gratitude he is owed makes it all the more horrifying, therefore, that he was treated so inhumanely. In 1952, he was convicted of ‘gross indecency’ - in effect, tried for being gay. His sentence - and he was faced with the miserable choice of this or prison - was chemical castration by a series of injections of female hormones. He took his own life just two years later.”
He concluded: “So on behalf of the British government, and all those who live freely thanks to Alan’s work I am very proud to say: we’re sorry, you deserved so much better."
In 1999 Time Magazine named him as one of the 100 Most Important People of the 20th Century.
from The University Of Manchester

Churches Switching From Pepsi To Coke

FLORIDA - A mega church that draws several thousand worshippers to Sunday services has pulled the plug on Pepsi products.
The last of 10 Pepsi vending machines were wheeled out the door this week at Bell Shoals Baptist Church and replaced with Coke machines, but the switch wasn't spurred by a taste test.
Terry Kemple, a member of Bell Shoals Baptist and president of the Community Issues Council, said the church's decision to boycott Pepsi products came after months of failed discussions with the soft drink company.
The council, formed "to promote and protect Judeo-Christian values" according to its Web site, and church officials asked the soft drink company to curb its support of groups, events and legal issues that "oppose traditional family values," Kemple said.
The company, Kemple said, sponsors major gay pride parades and events across the country.
"This year, they pumped millions of dollars into organizations that opposed California's same-sex marriage ban, Proposition 8," he said. "There are a lot of corporations that have diversity programs, but Pepsi goes far beyond."
The council meets with about 50 churches each month to discuss issues that conflict with traditional Christian values. Other local churches participating in the Pepsi boycott include Kings Avenue Baptist Church in Brandon and Plant City Church of God.
Kemple said more churches are expected to join the effort he hopes will send a strong message to corporate America.
"There have been many successful recent boycotts against companies like Kmart, Circle K and Ford Motor Co.," he said. "These companies were doing anti-family things like distributing pornography and advocating special rights based on a person's choice of sexual partners."
"We fight this battle one skirmish at a time," he said. "Our forefathers came here for religious liberty, not sexual liberty."
Representatives from Pepsi did not respond to requests for comments. Bell Shoals Baptist senior and associate pastors also declined to comment.
from The Tampa Tribune

Spanish Village Of Rainbow Weddings

CAMPILLO DE RANAS, SPAIN - Far from the hedonistic beaches of Ibiza or the disco nights in Barcelona, the tiny town of Campillo de Ranas — the Little Field of Frogs — is nestled in the rugged hills of Castilla-La Mancha, a 90-minute drive north of Madrid in Guadalajara province. With its squat slate houses barely rising above the rolling hillsides on which they are built, the town’s pretty Romanesque bell tower is the only thing that doesn’t blend into the landscape. The place would appear to be the perfect setting of an open-air staging of “The Flintstones.”
But first impressions can be deceiving. This small town, with around 60 full-time residents, most of them over 60, has in the last few years been transformed into the unofficial gay wedding capital of Spain.
In June 2005, Spain’s socialist government passed a law legalizing gay marriage and conferring the exact same rights and nomenclature — matrimonio in Spanish — to both homosexual and heterosexual unions. But soon after the law’s passage, several prominent and conservative mayors publicly declared that they would not perform gay marriages. Campillo’s nonprominent and liberal mayor, Francisco Maroto, who also happened to be openly gay, declared that he would perform them.
What happened next is the subject of a documentary film, “Campillo Sí, Quiero” (“Campillo Yes, I do”), which was produced and directed by Andrés Rubio and is making the rounds at gay and independent film festivals from Dublin to Buenos Aires. Shot over the span of a year, the film tells the story of how this hardscrabble hamlet, which was virtually abandoned 20 years ago, has been revived through a willingness to serve anyone who is willing to marry there. Saying “yes” to gay couples turns out to have lured straight ones as well and has spawned a wedding and tourism industry that coexists quite peacefully with the town’s rural character.
“Campillo shows what’s possible when you have the proper measure of tolerance and respect,” Mr. Rubio said in a phone interview, explaining what inspired him to make the film.
Since the summer of 2005, Mr. Maroto has married more than 140 couples. While gender is not listed on wedding records, the town archivist says that 40 percent of them have been same-sex couples. Brides and grooms — in various combinations — have come from all across Spain and as far as the United States and Russia to tie the knot in Campillo’s rustic city hall.
With its main salon painted a perky robin’s-egg blue and adorned with little more than a portrait of King Juan Carlos I, the Spanish flag and a rainbow flag — the presence of the first two being required by law at official acts like marriages — city hall is hardly the Chapel of Love, but then this town is hardly Las Vegas.
Visitors go to Campillo not to gamble, but to gambol along the miles of hiking trails winding through green pastures that are carpeted with wildflowers in springtime. In the heat of summer, folks hike to the poza del Aljibe, a spectacular natural swimming hole created by a cascading waterfall. In the autumn, the hillsides and riverbanks get a good grooming by locals and visitors out gathering berries and wild mushrooms.
The region is part of the Ruta de la Architectura Negra (Black Architecture Route), named for the quirky, vernacular slate buildings. For centuries, if not millenniums, virtually everything here has been constructed of slate, much of it tinged green with lichen or stained red by the iron content of the stone.
There is a pragmatically haphazard look to the buildings, a combination of odd angles and rounded corners that is instantly appealing. Despite their lack of architectural pretense, the houses convey a sense of nobility and permanence. With their silvery and irregular slate tiles gleaming in the sunshine, the gently sagging roofs look as if they could be made of molten lead dripped by the hand of a primordial giant.
Even before Campillo’s wedding fame, a small neo-rural return to the land was under way in the region, where electricity, such as it was, only arrived in the late ’ 50s. Landline phone service was installed just last December, mostly for high-speed Internet access.
Drawn by the simplicity of life and the beauty of the surrounding countryside, José Antonio Reig and his family arrived 12 years ago, when there were just a handful of residents. In 2001, the Reig family opened a restaurant and small hotel, Aldea Tejera Negra, and two years ago, started Alternatura, a tour company specializing in the region’s diverse outdoor activities.
Thanks to such efforts, Campillo’s country charm does not require roughing it. Aldea Tejera Negra puts on an elegant spread in wedding tents overlooking the hotel’s pool and surrounding hills. Across town — about 100 yards away — is a more intimate restaurant, La Fragua, where a cozy dinner for two might start off with homemade pâté and savory spinach and prawn croquetas followed by a tender filet mignon, all accompanied by an excellent Ribera del Duero and topped off with decadent chocolate truffles.
Other accommodations are equally civilized. While the nearby four-room Casa del Sol might want to rethink the creaky brass beds in a town known for weddings, no issue could be taken with the bohemian-chic charm of the place or with the delicious breakfast, which can include rustic homemade cinnamon bread topped with quince paste and mild queso fresco. Toasted bread is the ideal vehicle for sampling the local honey, which is a deep caramel color and has none of the cloying sweetness or floral aftertaste of most honey.
The influx of both workers for the hospitality industry and so-called neo-rurals has meant the reopening of Campillo’s elementary school, which had been shuttered for 32 years.
Though he was elected, Mr. Maroto’s post is an unpaid one, and like most residents he earns his living from the land. In 2007, he was re-elected in a landslide, and in 2008, he was married to Enrique Rodríguez, his partner of 15 years, by one of the town council members. While he acknowledges having an activist streak, he says he’s just doing his job.
“Mayors mostly have to deal with problems — sometimes we even get blamed for the weather — so it gives me a lot of satisfaction to be known for marrying people.”
from The New York Times

Parents Suing California Schools Over Mandatory Gay-Friendly Classes

ALAMEDA, CALIFORNIA - A lawsuit in California that was filed last month by angry parents who object to a gay-friendly curriculum they say is being foisted on kindergartners could well become a test case for schools around the country.
Parents in the Alameda Unified School District were refused the right to excuse their kids from classes that would teach all kids in the district's elementary schools about gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender alternative families.
The parents say they are concerned about "indoctrination" in the schools, but administrators say the course is needed to protect against sexual discrimination — and that the lessons are protected by laws in California and 10 other states.
Those states, which stretch from Washington to Maine, will now be eyeing the court results in California in a case that warring sides say pits parents' rights against a schools' responsibilities.
The contested California curriculum includes an annual 45-minute LGBT lesson taught to kids from kindergarten through the fifth grade. The kindergartners will focus on the harms of teasing, while the fifth graders will study sexual orientation stereotypes.
The move toward the new classes began two years ago, when teachers noticed that even kindergarten students were using derogatory words about sexuality, such as "fag."
The FOX News Reporting unit was present at a debate in the school district in May when angry parents pushed back against the controversial lessons, capturing over 10 hours of heated dispute, which saw parents shouting back and forth across the aisle.
Some parents like Carrie Brash said the curriculum is necessary to combat bigotry that was already rearing its head among even young children, who were bullying her daughter in school.
Brash said her daughter had to endure taunting chants of "Lesbian, lesbian, your mom's a lesbian," from kids in school.
But other parents said the new curriculum ignores other kids who have been targeted for abuse.
"My child has been the product of bullying because she's black," said Dion Evans, who noted that students have "never viewed a single video in the classroom" that deals with racism.
But Evans said he wasn't expecting the district to take care of what he called a parent's duties in educating his daughter, as the school is "already (too) strapped for cash to incorporate these changes."
"I know how to successfully parent, educate, and instill value and self-worth in my child," he said.
from Fox News

'American Idol' Finalist Jim Verraros Gets Married

ILLINOIS - From the matching Tom Ford bowties to the unity sand ceremony to the 10-ft. ice sculpture bar, the wedding of American Idol's Jim Verraros to entrepreneur Bill Brennan on Sunday was planned down to the last detail.
"Every little choice reflected who we are," says Verraros, who finished ninth on Idol's first season. "It was the most beautiful day."
The couple, who wed at the Oak Brook Hills Resort in Illinois, exchanged self-penned vows under dragonwood trees decorated with white hydrangeas, orchids and roses. The singer, 26, in a tuxedo by Ermenegildo Zegna and shoes by Christian Dior, walked down the aisle strewn with white rose petals to the tunes of a classical trio playing Johann Sebastian Bach's "Air."
The outdoor event included a unity sand ceremony in which the couple and their family members poured individual glasses of colored sand into a large vase.
"Since this is a gay wedding, we wanted both traditional touches as well as original ones," says Verraros, whose father Nicholas Verraros and Brennan's father William Sr. served as best men.
"Gay marriage is not legal in Illinois," Verraros says, "but we wanted the day to be a reflection of our love and commitment to each other as well as a statement to other gay couples in Illinois."
After the ceremony, the newlyweds and their 174 guests enjoyed cocktails by an ice sculpture bar carved with three lions. The old Hollywood-themed reception was held inside a tent, where florist Anthony Gowder had created 5-ft. centerpieces made of roses, amaranthus, white orchids, willow branches and hanging crystals.
After the first dance, to Elvis Presley's "Can't Help Falling in Love," the couple cut their 4 ½-ft. tall white wedding cake with vanilla buttercream frosting before hitting the dance floor until midnight to a 10-piece orchestra playing 1940's tunes to contemporary dance music.
Verraros and Brennan met four years ago when Brennan sent the singer a message to his MySpace account. "We found out we lived 20 minutes apart," says Verraros, who was born and raised in Crystal Lake, Ill. "I wanted to meet someone with substance and he changed my life. He's an incredible person."
The singer recently released two new singles, "Touch (Don't U Want 2)" and "Electric Love," on YouTube. He's currently working on his next album.
from People Magazine

Caster Semenya Gets A New Look

SOUTH AFRICA - It's been a week of change for Caster Semenya, the South African runner at the center of a gender controversy at last month's world track championships.
First, one of her South African coaches quit the team in shame for not telling Semenya that she was being subjected to gender tests. (Semenya had thought she was taking a doping test.) Then, Semenya appeared on the cover of South Africa's You magazine with a complete makeover designed to silence critics who insist she is a man.
For the shoot Semenya sported a less ambiguous hair style, a designer black dress, jewelry, makeup and nail polish. Despite what you think about the whole situation, it's safe to say that this is the first time that Semenya has truly looked like an 18-year old woman.
She says she likes the look too. Semenya told the BBC:
"I'd like to dress up more often and wear dresses but I never get the chance. I am who I am and I'm proud of myself."
Let's hope this is what she wants though.
Nothing Semenya has done in the past month has suggested that she likes to wear dresses, get manicures and let down her hair. After the controversy broke, she kept her cornrows, wore baggy clothes and pounded her chest in victory like a college football cornerback. When she returned to her hometown, she was dressed the same way. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. That seemed to be Semenya's natural inclination. This feels forced.
Hopefully I'm wrong. But if Semenya was pressured to do this to silence her critics, then this is a sad story rather than one of retribution. The opinions of a few jealous coaches shouldn't have an effect on how an 18-year old carries herself. If Semenya wants to wear dresses then she should. But if she wants to run around in track suits, what's the problem with that?
The coach who resigned wasn't Semenya's personal coach, but a middle distance supervisor on the South African team who was ashamed that Semenya was kept in the dark about the growing controversy. Wilfred Daniels said he was told the issue was supposed to stay private.
from Yahoo Sports

Related Post: Runner To Have Gender-Test

Just One Look...#116

Soap Star Says Firing Was Over Gay Story Line

If you tuned in to the soap "One Life to Live" this week, you may have noticed there's been a change of character. One character in particular.
Actress Patricia Mauceri says she was fired and abruptly replaced for objecting to a gay storyline because of her religious beliefs.
Mauceri played the recurring role of Carlotta Vega on "OLTL" for the last 14 years. But when she objected to how the writers wanted her deeply religious character, a Latina mother, to handle a storyline involving homosexuality, she objected. And for that she claims she was fired.
Mauceri, 59, a devout Christian, told FOX News that character Vega's gay-friendly dialogue was not in line with the character she helped create by drawing on her own faith.
"I did not object to being in a gay storyline. I objected to speaking the truth of what that person, how that person would live and breathe and act in that storyline," she said. "And this goes against everything I am, my belief system, and what I know the character's belief system is aligned to."
Mauceri said she was replaced despite offering changes to the script and hoping for a compromise.
An ABC spokesperson said they were not aware of any such claims by Mauceri, adding such claims "would be frivolous."
When asked why Mauceri is no longer playing Carlotta Vega, the spokesperson said the show does not comment on personnel matters. The scene in question was scheduled to air Friday afternoon.
Mauceri told FOX News she is exploring her legal options. AFTRA, the actors union that represents her, did not respond to a request for comment.
from Fox News